Lyrics to "Diagnosis Wenckebach"

This is an approximation of the lyrics

Diagnosis Wenckebach (lyrics)

Diagnosis Wenckebach (What?)
It’s AV nodal block and that’s a fact (Yah!)
Take PR interval and lengthen that (Yup)
Brady-arrhythmia and heart attack (Oh no)

Take it to the node

Mobitz I (or Obiwan?)
My PR interval it elongates
The QRS gets missed, oh what a shame
I think the AV block in me is to blame

Take some more recordings…..

Chorus:
Check lead II (AV type I nodal)
What you gonna do? (AV type I nodal)
Doc’s don’t hurt me please (AV type I nodal)
I’m blocked in all 3’s (AV type I nodal)
Show me what you treat me with (?sic) (AV type I nodal)
Just shock me into sinus (AV type I nodal)
I don’t really want to die (AV type I nodal)
????Just keep me alive

Get this node going……… (repeat) You ready?

Diagnosis Wenckebach (hello)
Ever since we started on this Cardiac (Lub)
I’ve turned into a hypochondriac (Dub)
I’m all filled up with those sclerotic plaques (Oh no)

Take it to the node

Mobitz I
You see those extra p waves on the front
I need some atropine or else I’m done
You say ‘but I don’t know’ but you’re just dumb

Take some more recordings

(Chorus) you ready??

Guess I got Wenckebach (that’s correct)
The mother rhythm don’t know how to act, (Uh-huh)
Got those grouped beats you know and that’s a fact (yup)
Slowing conduction down the AV tract (that’s right)

Take some more recordings